I agree with Thereaa. One of the hardest transition is the mental state. That one is hard. There will always be a difference as what you want to look and what you will look.
But you know what. Some people don’t even have that image the one you want to look, the one you want to be. They see you right now and they might think. Wow!
I only started. As well I’m hopeful. It’s going to be a hardeous journey, but I know in the end it will matter.
I started to get in shape with this hope. (I’m obese always had image problem…)
Even if I were to fail or feel like I will… Well I will have achieved something. Nobody’s perfect but someone might find your imperfection as perfect for them.
My fashion sense is terrible. I might just want to express my look as goth later like something I repress during my teenage years. I look more like a bear : I am still bulky… and might not look like “girl” in societal sense. I had built that image repressing myself and my want. Never learned in my family.
I don’t know you or your situation. But I strongly believe it’s always good to keep fighting and hang on. 23 days since I started hrt. Deconstructing gender norms is hard no matter what. Probably at some point will do FFS. But right now. Still in my CO phase as well as HRT journey.
I ended up writing more about me than trying to give advice but I hope I can inspire you a little bit and give you hope since it is a battle of the self.
I don’t know personally at least for me. I have been depressed. Not feeling a lot. Got used to it. Lucky enough I could cope without medication because I met my wife 8 years ago. I had to… “Toughen up” (which let’s be honest was more leave my sense of self to the side…) since my wife had more trauma and needed help. Today well it’s a bit better for us. But never over, situation hasn’t changed much except for focusing on my own a bit more.
Soon it’s going to be 4 week. Overall happier I think? It is because or hormones? I don’t think so, or don’t know. I guess it’s from accepting my “new” or repressed self.