I am new to the fediverse, and could have misconfigured my docker image. But, I have de-sync issues the same way. What I started doing is browsing other Lemmy instances directly. Because my subscription does not seem to pull all content and all comments. It picks and chooses to sync about 4 or 5 post out of the ~50 a day from my 6ish different subscriptions.
I am not totally sure how the software talks back and forth between instances. But, it seems like a huge issue if instances don’t have a feature to stay in sync.
I can consistently switch between Ortho and my laptop, hitting nearly 70WPM on both. I would say it took about a month before something clicked in my brain and I stopped trying to use my thumbs for mods on my laptop and miss hitting the key locations. Just give it more time. Your muscles can remember a ton of different things, brain just needs to figure out how to organize it.