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Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 month ago

DHS warns any action by Americans will be treated as domestic terrorism

theonion.com

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  • aiop@lemmy.world
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DHS warns any action by Americans will be treated as domestic terrorism

theonion.com

Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 month ago
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  • aiop@lemmy.world
DHS Warns Any Action By Americans Will Be Treated As Domestic Terrorism
theonion.com
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WASHINGTON—Claiming that the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agent who fatally shot 37-year-old Minneapolis resident Renee Good as she drove away from him was “fully justified,” Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem warned Thursday that any action taken by Americans would be treated as domestic terrorism. “Make no mistake: Anything and everything Americans do, from the second […]

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/41508279

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  • Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca
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    1 month ago

    Can it be satire if it’s true?

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      1 month ago

      Yes

  • Glytch@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    It’s gotta be hard to be a satirical journalist when you know you’re writing next week’s real headlines.

  • altphoto@lemmy.today
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    1 month ago

    How about just eating an orange?

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      1 month ago

      If it’s not an apartheid orange from Israel, that’s terrorism.

      • altphoto@lemmy.today
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        1 month ago

        It’s from Costco. Oh shit, This morning I got up from the couch and I took a shower and had breakfast and drove to work. I’m not sure if any of that is not legal anymore.

        • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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          1 month ago

          That depends: are you a cishet rich white Christian man who loves fascism?

          If not, I’m afraid that merely existing is grounds for summary execution.

          • altphoto@lemmy.today
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            1 month ago

            I’m gonna need a second opinion from a different doctor LOL.

            • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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              1 month ago

              Fair enough. I’ll get you a referral for Ronny “Candy Man” Jackson.

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      The eating of an orange is a lot like a domestic terrorism

      • altphoto@lemmy.today
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        1 month ago

        No!!! What should I do now!

  • BigDiction@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Understandable but can we make an exemption for purchasing goods and services?

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