• Egon [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      Ye havn’t the wit of a barnacle! Ye be needin’ t’be pencil-whipped by one o’ them 8-legged creatures o’ the sea, fer ye can’t read worth a shit! You be nothing more than a putrid pile o’ dog dung lashed t’the dock and about as useful as tits on a bull! Ye be the lowest of the low, a wretched cretin fit only fer sailin’ in the bilges! Arrr! Yer a worthless lubber who knows nothing o’ navigation, and I’d be more than glad to see ye go overboard! This be yer last chance–stop yer foolishness and listen to someone wiser than yerself. Otherwise, ye be headed for a watery grave! Ye be the veriest of fuckwits, ye scurvy scumbag! Yer naught but a blithering, worthless excuse of a human being, too witless and ignorant to even decipher the rudiments of reading! Yer the kind of boneheaded cretin who couldn’t pour piss out of a boot with instructions printed on the heel! Shiver me timbers, but it’s true! All ye deserve is a swift kick in the arse and a swig of rum to drive away the last remnants of yer ignorant stench!

        • Egon [they/them]@hexbear.net
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          1 year ago

          Listen here, you sorry excuse for a human, you better hightail it outta here before I pull out my six-shooter and make ya walk the plank! You ain’t worth the dust on my shoes, ya puny dweeb. You got no brains in that noodle of yours, don’tcha? All you can do is bumble around, too dim-witted to even read. Big man with no brains, what a joke. It’s time to take a break, you useless mutt. Now scram before I put an end to your foolishness! Why don’t you crawl back under whatever rock you crawled out from, ya dweeb. You think you’re hot stuff because you can’t read? Hey, I got news for you, pal: it’s the 1920s, and if you can’t read, you’re about as useful as a one-legged man at a butt-kicking contest. Get outta here before I give ya the business end of my knuckle-duster.