• dillekant@slrpnk.net
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    1 year ago

    Thanks Janet. Seems like you two do a great job of communicating. Would you say you both share the management tasks 50/50 as well? With me and my wife, neither of us “owns” the problem, we just both do things to solve it based on what annoys us. It works pretty well usually, but I do feel like we should draw lines to say “no this is definitely my project to manage”.

    • Very_Bad_Janet@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Would you say you both share the management tasks 50/50 as well?

      I think it depends on the task. We have our areas that we focus on (e.g., me laundry, him cooking) but there are others where we come together/alert each other of issues or tasks that are coming up (e.g., selecting afterschool for our children).

      • dillekant@slrpnk.net
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        1 year ago

        Yeah interesting. I feel like there’s also a sort of ownership that comes from actually doing the work, so doing the cooking means managing the cooking, but things you both need to share are managed in a shared way too, like school pickups (almost everyone I know has to co-ordinate these).

        I feel like comics like the above sometimes give men the permission to not “own” being adults, because “that’s just how men are”, but fundamentally that’s not true. In my view, the right and masculine thing to do is to do half the work and communicate, share, etc.