Hey everyone,
I [28F] need some advice on handling anxiety when job hunting.
Almost a week ago I finished school and I’m once again without work. I’ve been job hunting about 40-50% of my adult life and it has taken a huge toll on my mental health to the point where I’m barely able to apply for jobs anymore. I have gotten a few warnings over the years due to not applying to enough jobs. ( I live in Sweden btw )
I have tried taking breaks.
I have tried waiting for the anxiety to pass.
I have asked so many for advice but it’s like they all give the same default answer. If their advice where enough, I would be a pro at job hunting.
I did get an autism diagnosis a few years back and I do feel better about myself, more confident and understanding of how I work so I think this time around will be different, but it’s like the old anxiety still hangs around and I don’t know how to get rid of it.
Please if you have any advice, I’d love to hear it.
Sounds like you do a great job! So far have you done pretty much everything I given advice on and a looot more haha
You sound very ambitious and that will always end well :D
Sounds like it is more about demand then anything else. Arvika is very small and all the other “cities” in Värmland is not bigger. Like Karlstad you ride a bike through that city in no time 😂
Prices depends a lot on where in Stockholm you want to live. In the inner city will it always be expensive but just a bit outside like 30 min with subway or bus will it be a lot more reasonable. Even 15 min with subway can take down the price a lot.
Gothenburg, can also be a choice. A lot of IT companies are ok with remote work. I live and work in Stockholm but I travel only to our hq on Wednesdays (if I am not at a customers office). So you could travel to the office only once a month (or less). We have some that lived pretty far away (almost as far as Arvika) that only comes over on bigger events and some who travel a bit more often for the smaller events. But in my opinion is it a lot more fun to have coworkers so once a week for me is the minimum, but we are all different :D
Thank you! I’ve build my ways over the years to keep track of everything 😅
We have like 3 companies with developers (Tickster is among them, kinda cool) but there are a lot more companies in Karlstad, it’s tiny compared to Stockholm but it’s still a fairly big city. A few years back I counted to around 40 companies of interest.
30min commuting distance isn’t bad at all! How is it to actually get an apartment? I’ve heard there are long waitinglists and you’ll rent in 3rd or event 4th or 5th hand. Sometimes short periods a time jumping from apartment to apartment?
I’m one of those who really like to go to the office, I like to go every day. I feel like I’m going to go crazy if I’m home to much 😆
Oh that is pretty good! I thought it would be a lot more worse.
It is much easier to buy an apartment, I have never rented because of that. I went for a new built apartment so I didn’t even need to fight for it haha. The queue system that is the hardest is for Stockholm stad where ppl sign up the day they turn 18. There are many others. Like HSB, where you save up points to be used for buying or renting. My Friends have mostly got a first hand contract but some got a second hand and then used that time to find a first hand and some just make sure they are in a relationship at all times 😂
my understanding is that if you got time then you can find a first hand contract but if you are a bit more in a hurry is second hand a lot more common. If you have someone who can “gå i borgen” for you then that will also help out a lot. I save money at hsb so if I ever want to buy anything from them or rent in the future then I can do that. Plus hsb is everywhere and seem to be the easiest to be apart of, but so far do I like where I live and I don’t think I will move unless I need to get something bigger :D and also once you got a first hand contract or your own apartment are you all set. I have many friends who rent who trade their apartments for something else when needed so they don’t have to stand in the queue again.
Yea we have those kind of ppl too. We recently moved and they started using the new office (it is not done yet) the day they had access even tho it is so messy right now, like some rooms have no lamps for example 😂
ooh I see, I never knew it was easier to buy, and it can’t be hard to sell in such a big city, right? So that won’t be a huge risk.
I should check if I can get a loan for an apartment and how that works.
ooh I see, well if I move to Stockholm or Gothenburg it will probably be pretty fast as it’s for a job unless I can work from home the first month or so. I will look into HSB too, I have a list with housing queues too. I like lists…
Smart to trade apartments! You know a lot about this.
ahaha omg maybe that’s a bit too much even for me! It must be hard to concentrate in that environment!
Depending on where the apartment is ofc but in general is it very easy to sell. The apartments haven’t really changed much in prices either compared to houses so it is pretty stable.
I think the hardest part in all of this is finding something you like, how far away from the inner city, supermarkets, parks, entertainment, busses, subways, and so on are you ok with and also how much you are willing to pay. Also having a car here can be very expensive because of parking and “tull”. But you also have everything close by plus you can buy heavy stuff off the internet. I will never try to take home cat sand if i buy more than 8kg, it is a workout on its own even tho it isn’t far 😂
My observation of why ppl say it is hard to rent is because they go to bostadsföreningen and never look anywhere else plus they also do not want to pay x amount and wish to live in the inner parts and I think most who have problems getting an apartment is pretty young too and do not have the money or the job for it. But I am speculating. If you want to rent look for private listings too that is my tips. They will be a bit more pricy per month tho.
I think the reason it is easier to find something to buy is because the regulations. I have heard it is hard to get permission to rent out because of it. But I haven’t read much into it but I think it makes a lot of sense if you look at the market for apartments, a lot more is for sale than for renting.
I have a friend whose old company “rent” him an apartment. The good thing is that he lived there for “free” the bad thing was when he wanted to leave and study for something else. He was stuck with that job until he found a new place.
I am pro buying because it is a lot easier and a lot of new apartments are being built every year. It is also easier to find something you actually like, just go to hemnet and you will have so many pages to click through haha.
Haha yea I won’t go there until it is actually done. They put up pictures of the progress and there are many worker there putting everything together haha
Yeah I can imagen that is hard, combined with a reasonable price. I haven’t had a car in years and it’s actually pretty nice as it’s easy to rent one when I need a car. There are two things I do miss, the spontaneous part of owning a car, I can just go if I want to, and I miss being able to do weekly or monthly grocery shopping.
I do like to rent as if something breaks it’s not my responsibility, but I also never had a lot of money so I can’t just buy a new stove if it breaks or so. It might be a question about money…
ooh that makes me think of those work towns in America, companies own whole towns, so in order to live there you or the person you live with will have to work at that company.
I love scrolling through Hemnet, so many pretty homes, and some are really unique. Love it.
Yea but it is not a problem I just buy everything off the internet if it is too heavy to carry or just annoying to carry like big packages of toilet papers. but I do like to walk to the store and do my weekly shopping. I just take a backpack with me and what doesn’t fit will I carry in my hands. Sometimes do I use my scooter if I don’t feel like being healthy 😂
Car pool or renting is common here, but nobody really wants to drive in Stockholms inner city. Bikes are very common too. We have okaish bike lanes. Some streets are better than others.
Haha oh yea, I have heard of those. Crazy stuff.
Yea I like checking now and then to see what stuff is worth. It is also cool to see what kind of furniture and wall decoration ppl got. Both has changed a lot over the years. But white will always be the default color for everything except the bed room it seems 😂
Hahaha yes, it’s really nice to get stuff to the door! Speaking of that, I need to order “litter pellets” for my cats.
It’s good to be able to tho, nice for longer trips or if you need to go to the veterinary or stuff like that. I can imagine, I’ve driven on the outskirts of Gothenburg and a couple of times in Oslo. It’s a whole other thing than driving in smaller towns.
White is soooo boring tho. I mean, I understand why people light bright walls, but why not go for pastels or something? Or accent walls, I like accent walls.
Had to check the difference between the two: Pellets vs clay litter Pellets seem to be a lot of work, how does that work for you? I clean my cats litter box 3 (sometimes 4) times a day would it be annoying cleaning pellets that many times? Do you need to clean it as often? Do your cats like it? My cat wants to be able to to dig. He digs a lot.
Oh yea that helps. If I had kids I would buy a house and a car. Or buy an apartment with a parking lot included (or a reasonable price). Mine doesn’t have one, you need to pay for parking in a multi-storey car park and it is pretty price and there are no parking spots outside close by that is for longer than 4 hours.
The good thing about white tho is that you can go crazy with the furniture because white works with all colors and won’t remove focus from things like paintings. But you can’t have white furniture and white walls it will just be a cold boring room. I had a friend who had everything in white, even her clock, it was so unsettling and I don’t know why. Maybe because it was hard to see what was in there?
White stuff that should be “invisible” is great for white walls. You can have the white “solstickan” fire extinguisher and the white fire blanket on the wall in the living room in clear sight (for times in need) without gaining any focus unless it is needed. I don’t even think about it. It is almost like it isn’t there. Same with my white robot vacuum cleaner, it just blends in. But i would never want white floor tho. That is a big no. I love wood especially dark wood.
But yes white can be very boring. Especially if you got boring furniture.
I like accent walls that has a lot of texture in them like wood (you didn’t see that coming huh? ;) ) or are almost like a painting like a mural but calming like this or something less abstract like this or this one i could actually have this in my bedroom, this will be the last one i really like the colors, super calming but i think i rather have it as a big painting not a whole wall painting haha
It is very important to me to feel calm at home. So no busy things and everything needs a practical use or at least serve a purpose like my cats cat tree, I could had just let him have a cat scratching post or let him go for my furniture but he really likes to be high up and somewhere where he can see me at all times otherwise he will follow me like to the toilet. He wont let me be by myself for long xD
We really went off topic btw, didn’t realize until now, we have our own small chat “room” haha