OTTAWA - Last weekend, Canada's Ministry of National Defence confirmed their main strategy to fend off a potential invasion from the United States is to wait for American forces to be killed off by the many preventable diseases currently plaguing the country.
“To quote The Art of War, the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself,” said Minister of Defense David McGuinty. “While this is arguably applicable to most things in the Trumpadministration, we figured it would be simplest to barricade the border and wait for the entire army to succumb to whatever virus or contaminated lettuce they could’ve eradicated months beforehand.”