• hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I’m autistic. I was bullied pretty heavily between the ages 13 to 17. While I’m a successful adult now, that was a pretty rough time in my life and left a lasting impression.

    There are a million ways to attack Trump, and almost as many ways to attack conservatives as a whole. The fact that Democrats chose to hyper focus on his lack of social conformity doesn’t sit well with me. The way everyone seems absolutely giddy to apply this insult at every opportunity gives me visceral flashbacks to my own mistreatment.

    People talk about this election as Harris v Trump, but it’s really Harris v Trump v Staying home. I’m not voting for somebody who blatantly and proudly acts like a high school bully. The idea that my decision makes me a bad person is ridiculous, and IMO more a reflection of the person claiming that than myself.

    • WamGams@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      I understand you were bullied, and I am truly sorry you had to go through that. But think of the kids like you and think whether those children will be better off under Trump, or Kamala.

      Instead of threatening us to stay home (and help him get reelected) unless we stop telling the truth about him, I strongly urge you to consider therapy. What happened to you should have never happened, but with help you can still have a great life ahead of you.

      • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        I go to therapy, I take medication, I put a lot of effort into managing my illness. I have a great job, great friends, and a great girlfriend. I’m 30 now, and that process started in my senior year of high school.

        Most of US politics is choosing between the lesser of two evils. You’re usually gonna end up voting for someone you dislike in some way. At the same time, at some point you need to draw a line.

        For me, the weirdo comments were the last straw. It would be one thing if they existed in a vacuum, but IMO they are part of a pattern. I’ve seen, both online and in real life, a lot of people justifying shitty behavior by leveraging liberal political coding. While I’m no longer a target, it’s still distressing to see. I feel that by voting blue, I’d be helping normalize that behavior.

        I live in a state with ten million people. The vast majority of people aren’t autistic, and I’m willing to bet most autistic people don’t vote anyway. There are plenty of other people without my hangups that can vote for Harris.

        As a sidenote I don’t necessarily think autistic kids, especially boys, will be significantly better under Harris. While she would put more funding into education, democrats really have done boys a disservice over the past decade. While awareness has increased, young men in many ways have it worse in terms of mental health issues than they did a decade ago. Harris hasn’t shown any commitment to address or reverse these trends.

        • WamGams@lemmy.ca
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          3 months ago

          Donald Trump has been accused of rape by more than one woman, but him being called weird is your final straw?

          Trump told his nephew that disabled people should just die, and you think Kamala will be worse for autistic children.

          Let’s drop the pretense: this has nothing to do with your autism, and all about the fact that you are fundamentally okay with fascism, despite knowing that you will likely be one of the first victims of it.

          Just be honest.

          • Ragnarok314159@sopuli.xyz
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            3 months ago

            Trump also open mocked people with disability. But this dude didn’t care, it’s democrats calling people weird.

            This reeks of some next level Russian propaganda bullshit.

            • WamGams@lemmy.ca
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              3 months ago

              A lot of the accounts on here were only Palestine supporters to sink the Biden campaign.

              They are still finding their footing on how to tank Kamala.

            • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              Again, not voting for Trump. Never planned on voting for Trump.

              Think about this logically. I’m obviously not an LLM. That means I would have to be an actual person writing this, presumably in Russia. Lemmy as a whole has a fraction of the popularity reddit has, which in turn is much less popular than stuff like TikTok and Instagram. This Lemmy instance isn’t super popular, and this sub isn’t particularly popular on this instance.

              My highest voted comment of all time is me making up batman dialogue. My highest voted comment today is in regards to the definition of the word skeet. If I was a Russian propagandist, I would be on a fast track to being defenestrated on account of how useless I am.

              I think it’s just easier for you to to paint me as some monster or shill than acknowledge that I’m an actual person who came to my conclusion as a result of lived experiences.

          • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            I’m not voting for Trump, I am staying home. I previously voted for Obama, Hillary, and Biden. I have volunteered for my local democratic party in 2018. This isn’t a decision I made lightly, and telling me I’m a horrible person for doing so is only going to reinforce my beliefs.

            • WamGams@lemmy.ca
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              3 months ago

              Where did I call you a horrible person?

              That’s dishonest. My argument is that you are mistaken and allowing your trauma to have you make irrational decisions.

                • WamGams@lemmy.ca
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                  3 months ago

                  You are more okay with fascism than calling fascists weird.

                  What conclusions should I draw from that?

                • DxK@lemmy.worldOP
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                  3 months ago

                  That’s the conclusion most people are going to reach when someone tells them, “I’ve decided to stay home because the democrats are calling the fascists weird.” You made your decision. At least have the courage to own it.

                  • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                    3 months ago

                    For so long I’ve put up with so much toxicity, both online and IRL, because I was worried not doing so would make me a bad person. I’m not doing that anymore. Idk if that’s courage, but it does feel liberating.

        • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
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          3 months ago

          (please read literally–no judgement intended) From one medicated, therapied autist to another: You might want to bring up these emotions with your therapist. You seem to be taking calling Republicans “weird” personally, and I know my therapist would be interested if I were having a similar reaction. My therapist would be all “ok, let’s look at the emotions wheel and figure out what you’re feeling, then we can talk about why”. Talking with your professional about this might help you weather the current political season in a more healthy way.

          I’ve literally sent my therapist a Discord thread conversation that haunted me. My therapist was able to help dissect the interaction and I have a better understanding of which of my metaphorical buttons were pressed, so I’m more able to deal with similar situations in the future.

          • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            I’ve talked with my therapist a lot. The conclusion I’ve come to is while the level of upset I get is outsized, my emotions are valid.

            The weird comment was just the last straw. Since 2018, I’ve seen so much toxic behavior justified by political coding. It started off online, but post covid it really hit the mainstream. A lot of this behavior is almost objectively unacceptable, and the talking through this kind of stuff with my therapist affirmed my gut feeling that the political coding was just an excuse. Here are some examples I’ve seen, from online and real life:

            • During covid, there was a subreddit called HermanCainAward. It made fun of antivaxxers actively dying from covid via screenshots of their social media pages. While it was supposedly about awareness, the comments seemed absolutely giddy
            • It’s pretty common for liberal social media personalities to insult conservative for being ugly and unable to succeed with woman. This is in direct contradiction to their claims that slit shaming is unacceptable and their messaging about body positivity
            • I’ve met multiple women in “ethical” polyamaorous relationships. They weren’t ethical. The women in questions were in LTRs, wanted a harem, and the partner always ended up devasted. Every time it was justified by framing poly as a sexual identity and throwing shade in regards to gender roles and heteronormativity
            • I’ve met a significant number of women who treat men as a whole in a toxic manner. I used to gently ask how they would feel if that was the way they were being treated, and I always got a liberally-coded lecture about historical oppression
            • Democrats in my city proudly matched in support of Hamas, a totalitarian regime dedicated to the murder of Jews worldwide. They justified this by using oppressor/oppressed rhetoric
            • I’ve seen people excommunicated from a friend group for problematic behavior, but that standard is never evenly applied. A single, not conventionally attractive, guy can be cut off on a single sentence. Meanwhile a conventionally attractive man or woman can say horrid things and they’ll be excused.
            • My siblings will straight up try to trigger an autistic meltdown any time I see them. They’ll always justify it by saying I was doing something problematic, but their justification was super thin.
            • The biggest assholes I know are super vocal about being liberal. Like they’ll be casually cruel to people, but then brag about going to drag brunches.
            • A lot of TV shows and movies these days are straight up bad, but then use flimsy political coding to imply that anyone who doesn’t like said IP is just a deplorable

            At this point I’ve seen this toxicity on a personal level, from democratic politicians, on social media, and in traditional media. It is very much a real part of liberal culture.

            What therapy has also helped me realize is that, in the past, I felt a similar resentment towards conservative culture. My shift in anger corresponds to when I moved from a more conservative area of the county to a liberal area of the country. I think that there are a certain type of people who are just shitty and looking to excuse their behavior, and political coding is the way to do that in 2024.

            I’ve also explored how I became the person I am today, specifically how I “beat” the bullying. The answer was ultimately that I disengaged. Senior year of high school I avoided anyone in my grade that I didn’t have an explicitly good relationship with, and successfully attempted to make friends outside of my school. In college, I chose a university that students from my high school almost never go to, and made it a point to attempt to form connections from people with a different background. After college, I made a commitment to not move anywhere close to my hometown.

            I am actively applying these conclusions to my decision not to vote. My feelings that liberal culture is toxic are valid. The best way to deal with them is to disengage. At the same time, there are equivalent issues in conservative culture that I’m not having an emotional reaction to by virtue of lack of exposure. So, the best solution is not to vote, and to transition to being a more apolitical person as a whole. While that’s by no means a perfect solution, absolutely nothing will change if I continue taking the same approach towards politics that I have for a good decade at this point.

            • TachyonTele@lemm.ee
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              3 months ago

              You need a much better therapist.

              This comm is about satire. Not your obviously deep seeded problems.

              • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
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                3 months ago

                Yeah, most of that just came out of left field and was entirely unrelated to anything he’d said before. At first I was like “wait, did they lemmy-stalk me and figure out my dad died of covid and my partner’s in a polyamorous relationship with a woman?” but no, it was entirely unrelated to anything.

                Just… I’m glad all that’s off his chest, but I fear that’s only because he’s using it as a bludgeoning weapon.

            • TachyonTele@lemm.ee
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              3 months ago

              It makes you a-ok with Trump winning though. Weird is not a racial slur, either.

                • TachyonTele@lemm.ee
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                  3 months ago

                  You’re doing a whole lot of assuming in your comments, along with the extremely heavy dose of sob stories.

                  • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                    3 months ago

                    Stop trying to gaslight me. I’ve seen this for years at this point. People will hurl insults and accusations, and then plead ignorance based off the idea that implications, connotations, and subtext don’t exist.

                    I was equivocated with the guy in the article. The guy in the article was heavily implied to be a racist. Therefore, I was called a racist.

                    Also the democratic party loves sob stories. Everyone’s lived experience matters except mine apparently.

            • Olhonestjim@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              If you’re really autistic, wear the “weird” label as a badge of honor like the rest of us do. You should also understand that it isn’t a slur, except to egotistical, conformative assholes who think they’re the normals ones.

              But they’re not. They’re weird, because they can’t handle facing the fact that they are.

              • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                3 months ago

                It’s not a badge of honor to have an intellectual disability that, among many other things, makes it harder to function in social situations.

                • Olhonestjim@lemmy.world
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                  3 months ago

                  It’s nothing to be ashamed of, and social situations are not all there is to life. Autistic people dive deeply into our interests, sometimes to the point it gets a little weird, and that’s an awesome thing to be proud of.

                  These fascists think they’re normal, and they need to be reminded how weird they are. They’re the only ones who think it’s an ableist term.

                  Them, and for some reason, you.

    • Kalysta@lemm.ee
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      3 months ago

      Donald Trump would have been one of those people who would have bullied you in school.

      Him and his ilk reacting so strongly to being called weird is proof that, like all bullies, they can dish it out but can’t take it.

      It’s showing the world how cowardly they are. And this is how I was always taught to deal with bullies - fight back.

      Remember, they don’t care when they’re called the worst insults of pedo, or rapist, or felon. But this hurts them. This is people who would have bullied you getting their comeuppance.

      • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        I agree that trump is a massive bully. However at this point Democrats are bullies too, even if they aren’t as bad.

        I feel like I’m watching a fight between the rich assholes on the lacrosse team and the slightly less rich assholes in JSA. At the end of the day they both bullied me. The best thing for me to do is just walk away.

        Also, read these comments. Like Jesus Christ if I wasn’t already dead set on my choice I would be now. You’re basically the only comment that actually tried to convince me to change my mind instead of just belittling me, which I do appreciate.

        This isn’t a decision I made lightly. Like I said, I’m a lifelong liberal. When I lived in red states and my vote didn’t matter, I volunteered for ballot initiatives that had a chance of passing. I voted in every election because I think it’s my civic duty to vote. I just can’t anymore. This entire thing is super toxic. It gets worse every year. I don’t want to be associated with any of it.

        • EatATaco@lemm.ee
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          3 months ago

          Holy shit is this really going to be the new “both sides”?

          “they might be actually attacking people for being different…but Democrats are calling them weird for this. I can’t, in good conscience, vote for Democrats!”

          • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            My decision is a direct result of my fairly unique life circumstances. I don’t think anyone else cares, and I don’t really hold that against them. There are a lot of things wrong with the world, and a lot of different reasons for people to vote a certain way.

            • EatATaco@lemm.ee
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              3 months ago

              You’re free to vote for whoever you want for whatever reason you want. Everyone else is free to point out how absolutely ridiculous those reasons are, especially when it’s clearly contradictory to what you are claiming to actually care about.

              • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                3 months ago

                The way they are doing it is needlessly vitriolic and cruel. I have a hard time seeing how anyone writing these comments can be a good person.

                • EatATaco@lemm.ee
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                  3 months ago

                  They’re literally just calling them weird, my man. If this is “needlessly vitriolic” then it might be time to look in the mirror because calling me a bad person is at least as bad as that.

    • abraham_linksys@sh.itjust.works
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      3 months ago

      What a bullshit story. Imagine how stupid you would feel if the fascists you support had spent years calling people names, in addition to their harmful anti middle class policies and attempts to steal elections.

      But the other party called them “weird” so basically the same, right?

      God damn fascists are dumb. Y’all gotta realize that most people aren’t as stupid as you if you’re going to bother trying to convince others.

      • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        There are 10.2 million people in my state. If the choice is as straightforward as you’re saying, Harris shouldn’t need my vote to win.

        I’m not gonna be shamed into voting for a candidate or a party that I find as toxic.

        • abraham_linksys@sh.itjust.works
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          3 months ago

          You could save yourself a lot of time coming up with and typing out these sob stories if you just say “I don’t care about other people being hurt”. It’s only affecting other people right? Surely you will never be affected.

            • samus12345@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              So you only cared if you thought you would be getting something out of it? Very Republican of you.

              • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                3 months ago

                No, I cared for years while getting nothing out of it. Meanwhile, behavior that was extremely upsetting to me was normalized on multiple levels. That care and respect was not returned.

                So I’m out.

                • abraham_linksys@sh.itjust.works
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                  3 months ago

                  You don’t have a clue about actual policy of either party do you? You’re just talking in vague feelings and bullshit. Like I said, you could save a lot of time if you were actually honest with yourself instead of playing these word games.

                  This clown saw the meme in OP and said “me too!” without a hint of irony 😂

                • samus12345@lemmy.world
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                  3 months ago

                  That’s your right, but I do wish you would acknowledge that your motivations are selfish rather than pretending otherwise.

    • papertowels@lemmy.one
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      3 months ago

      Ah yes, free tampons in schools, feeding kids, classic high school bully characterization.

      Fwiw, I don’t think it’s about social conformity in the usual sense. It’s about social conformity in the sense that the man’s Christmas/easter greetings wish for his opponents to rot in hell. That’s not just “not confirming to societal norms”. That’s basically equivalent to being the guy preaching through a microphone that everyone’s going to hell.

      Neuro-atypical folks are not getting caught in these cross hairs unless they also act as hateful.

    • LarmyOfLone@lemm.ee
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      3 months ago

      THis is not about “good weird” or nerdy like weird al yankovitch.

      This is the weird that the fascists are trying to tell you that democrats are trying to… I don’t know, some made up nonsense that just just weird. Majority Report has a good take on it.

      And sooner or later the fascists are going to come after autistic people too. Vote at your own peril.

      • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Again, I’m not voting. I’m tired of excusing toxic behavior because not doing so would make me a horrible person or a Nazi or whatever.

        • LarmyOfLone@lemm.ee
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          3 months ago

          democrats really have done boys a disservice over the past decade

          Ah I see now. It’s a weird thing to say some nonsense as “an aside” as if this was commonly understood what you are talking about. Presumably you’ve internalized sexism and it comes out in these weird ways. Hope you get it now.

            • Mammothmothman@lemmy.ca
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              3 months ago

              If the shoe fits…

              Stop making this all about you. You are flooding a comment section of a satire news thread about YOUR feelings and YOUR unprocessed trauma from school. This isn’t about YOU this is about a pack of political bullies getting the tables turned on them and they don’t like it at all and its working. Politics is a game and one party has been fighting dirty for decades now and your upset because the other party uses a word you don’t like? Go melt in a corner snowflake. Or grow the fuck up and stop making it all about you and your feelings.

              • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                3 months ago

                Comments from individuals are a huge part of Lemmy. I told people why I disagreed with the point this article was trying to make, and how that affected my personal decision to vote. My vote is ultimately going to be about me and the way I feel about both candidates/parties. That’s how voting works.

                I at no point told anyone to vote a certain way, or not to vote. I at no point implied anything about people who choose to vote for Harris. You’re the one who can’t handle any sort of perspective that sits outside your worldview.

                • Mammothmothman@lemmy.ca
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                  3 months ago

                  I can handle it just fine but in my perspective you are completely missi g the point of calling the GOP wierd.