24 M at a 3‑way fork for my life:

① Seattle/Portland SWE job,

② unfunded CS PhD (live with in‑laws),

③ $90 k Columbia BME master’s.

Which of these should I do?

Stats:

Me:

24 M, fresh BS CS (+ physics minor, 4.45 GPA, undergraduate research internships, swift student challenge winner, US citizen)

Spouse:

27 M, tech lead remote, $210 k comp, recession resistant job, very smart. But is not yet a citizen, temporary protective status from Syria, been in US since he was 13, scary times but ignoring it.

Current debt: 60 k @ 14 % (2k / mo) (Consolidated credit card debt)

Accepted programs:

  • PhD CS @ UCCS  (3-4yrs, 20k per year est)

  • MS Bio Medical Engineering @ Columbia (18 mo, $90 k tuition) (Have two weeks to accept/decline)

We like the PNW, the humidity and rain, and culture have been so nice(at ABnB right now). I could maybe get a tech job at about 100k, but slightly concerned with this economy, love research, my dream job would be R&D engineering job in the long term, but often requires masters/PhD.

Or maybe I pay money and network with rich people and create a start up at Columbia, or maybe I should start working now in case my spouse gets deported and we need to do something(sorta in denial about this option for now).

Or maybe we live in big house with my spouses parents (adoptive US citizens) in the country, like we have for 5 years now, but the 40 minute commute for UCCS PhD and isolation in Colorado Springs is something my partner, and to some extent I, want to leave. (Very loving and supportive, very grateful for them but we want to be adults and decide things like what’s for dinner for ourselves).

Or maybe I’m young and dumb and lack perspective and we should stay there until we pay down debt, but maybe moving is the jolt we need to start budgeting properly.

(Consolidated credit card debt is going down from 80k, just that partner used to have slightly excessive lifestyle, and has paid my way through college)

What do I do with my life?

So many choices right now, and they feel so final, difficulty sleeping for the past few nights.

Thank you for all your thoughts ahead of time!

  • venusaur@lemmy.world
    9·
    1 day ago

    If your partner is willing to support you for four years, try for the phd and the rest will be fallbacks. Especially if the phd debt is gonna be less than the MS. You could be accepted to an MS program again. You could live with in-laws maybe in the future if things fall apart. The whole deportation thing is something you should definitely have a fallback plan for though. Plan for the worst, expect the best.

    Either of the programs remote? You could move south to Mexico and wait things out for a bit since your partner works remote.

    Make whatever decision you think is best for you and your loved ones, but make backup plans in case things don’t work out. You’re relatively young so something goes south you have a lot of time to get back on your feet. You can afford to be risky.

    I’m just a rando who is not qualified to give this kind of advice.

    Best of luck!