Next life I’m coming back as a pampered cat.

Distance and accuracy training.

I done had me a case of the hoary puffleg the other night, dagnabbit.

Kristi Noem should prepare to spend the rest of her life behind bars when normal government resumes (and it will).

And also if there was a Reddit exodus because the mods and admins are power-tripping shitwallets.

No idea. I’ll have to Ask Jeeves.

How? They ignore existing legislation now and aren’t punished for it. Why would they follow new legislation?

Depends on how much he pays the judge.

“Oops!”

White supremacy newsletters sound like something that should be utterly mocked.

“Welcome back to this edishun of White Like Me! In news this month, I’m still white. But I did get a nasty sunburn on account of how I done had to stand out in the sun for a half hour in my best y-fronts to fix that lazy Jim Bob’s truck before I could take it on date nite with my sister. I blame them coloured folks with their melanine and new world order ties to the Demoncrates weather control sattelights an theyre five gee! When Elon fills the sky with his sattelights, then we gon see some progress! Hail Elon!”

I had Havana Syndrome once. Felt like I’d been rolled on the thigh on a virgin, smuggled into the US, clipped down one end and set on fire at the other, before some giant sucked smoke out of me. Crazy days.

It’s creepy how Vance’s eyes are looking at me, and it’s creepy how Trump looks like he anticipates going to the malt shoppe later.

But who will Victorian police high five now?

I strongly suspect they’d be more effective than Piss Pot Pete.

I just meant how it would look on the news. Might spur a few more people sitting at home into action.

Curious how he’s in custody for his murder trial, yet a certain ICEhole isn’t …

Someone should go to one of these protests with a copy of the constitution - preferably in a scroll of some kind - so that when an ICE rapist comes up to them, said agent will tear it away in a fit of anger. Photographers need to be ready to see ICE shredding the constitution physically (to drive home the message they’re doing it in general).

I probably wouldn’t have a giant picture window in front of the toilet.

I suspect Epstein’s list contains so many big and powerful figures from all over the world, it’ll never fully be released.

Can we not have an asteroid come out of nowhere and just flatten everything? It’s a tad overwhelming just how shit these politicians and billionaires and warlords and thugs and selfish motherfuckers have made the world, and I wanna start again.