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Cake day: February 22nd, 2026

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  • jtrek@startrek.websiteto196@lemmy.blahaj.zone•I didn't take that rule
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    6 hours ago

    I don’t relate to why some people need a call instead of just writing their words, but I guess that’s just how some people’s brains work. I’d almost always prefer clear written words I can refer back to.

    Assuming they’ll respond in a timely manner. Some people seem to send a text message, then throw their phone out the window, and only reply again once they’ve fetched it.




  • It’s weird to me when people shit on NJ despite never going there. It’s the same energy as when people repeat stupid jokes from reddit to feel like they’re part of the group. Makes my skin crawl a little.

    Also weird, but understandable I guess, is when people’s only experience with NJ is like the airport, or the Secaucus train station, and they assume the whole state is like that. Like thinking all of Nevada is Vegas’ strip. It’s not representative.

    NJ is fine. I mean, I detest the suburbs so large chunks of it are not for me.

    At this point I wouldn’t go back to NYC unless something pretty compelling made it worth dealing with the bullshit New York puts you through.

    NYC does have a lot of stuff happening. Pretty much any band on tour will play NYC, for one thing.










  • This meme was posted pretty recently.

    Dating apps are pretty bad. They’re not optimized for your happiness. They want your money. But they can get you dates, and some of those dates can be good. I’m a pretty average guy who doesn’t date men, and I could get a few dates a month by writing real messages and honestly engaging with people. Some of them were really good.

    But no matter what your strategy is, it’s going to have a big “garbage in -> garbage out” factor. I’ve had friends who half-ass the apps, and then wonder why they don’t have good outcomes. I don’t mean paying- never pay for this shit. I mean actually reading the profile and, if there’s something you can engage with, actually write something. Yeah, it’s work, and most of the time it goes into the void. But just looking at it for 20 minutes and writing nothing deeper than “lol” and “hey” is counter productive. It’s like going to the gym and just looking at your phone. You’re not going to get fit like that. You’re just going to feel bad about yourself.

    It’s fine to be like “i don’t have the energy for this” and spend your time doing something else. And it’s fine to take it seriously, write good messages, be present, be genuine. But half-assing it is the worst. Half-assing it sucks for you, and everyone you engage with.