Two hours ago I made a post to !libertyhub@lemmy.blahaj.zone about US politics. I had previously had a good relationship with the head moderator of this community. They’ve encouraged My political posts, and he’s removed comments by people that misgendered Me, and reminded people of My pronouns, like in this thread two days ago:

https://imgur.com/RuNKgM1.png

https://imgur.com/GLT7HR0.png

However, an hour ago in this new thread, the same moderator who was telling people to respect My capitalised pronouns uses lowercase pronouns to address Me:

https://imgur.com/fmGtHvf.png

And he has left up earlier comments which also seemed to misgender Me, and which I specifically pointed out:

https://imgur.com/KZnosuC.png

Even as some users in the thread gender Me correctly:

https://imgur.com/EBuGfom.png

I’m making this thread in the main community because since the mod has banned Me, I can no longer report the comment or leave a reply correcting the pronoun. I would like to gain the attention of @ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone

Misgendering trans people and banning Them at the same time so They can’t do anything about it is not the kind of thing I expect to see on Blahaj. This mod is clearly 100% aware of My pronouns, and made a choice here. I suppose they could be using the general “you”, but it just doesn’t look like that, what with banning Me, telling Me My post isn’t welcome, and telling Me to go to a different community. I used to have a good rapport with this mod, they said several times that they valued My posts. I posted something he disagrees with, and now all of a sudden respecting trans people’s pronouns isn’t a priority anymore. He’s misgendering Me and they’re leaving up comments that also misgender Me. It feels targeted.

EDIT: I cannot seem to embed images. Every time I hit edit and fix the image links and press save, they change to some kind of aussie.zone image proxy link. For now I have left them as links without embedding them.

  • Scary le Poo@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Capitalized pronouns.

    This, folks, is how you delegitimize an entire movement in one easy step.

    OP is mental.

  • riwo@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    capitalised pronouns are on a fundamental level as valid as any other gendered pronouns. fucking up can happen but not accepting OPs pronouns because they are unusual is shit

    i’m still blocking OP tho because no gods no masters

    edit:

    honestly i think no gods no masters is a generalizing slogan and we gotta look at what it actually stands for, which imo is the rejection of all authority. anarchy is imo about that, the rejection of authority and hierarchy.

    for that reason, as long as someones identity does not imply authority or supieriority or create hierarchical structures, i dont have an issue with them because of their identity, from an anarchist perspective.

    we should just let ppl be happy and be themselves. just let people identify as whatever they want. we can talk about it again when it causes real issues. for now the biggest issues are being cause by the identities of binary cis people anyway

    • DessertStorms@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      I can’t even begin to imagine the daily mental gymnastics required to reconcile thinking of yourself as a god and also claiming to be an anarchist lmao

      No gods no masters all the way.

  • LinkOpensChest.wav@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    You’re right. I did misgender You in that report, and I apologize. I have no excuse because I’m well aware You use capitalized pronouns. I even tried to be careful not to do so, but I still failed. I’ll fix it.

    As for the comment I left up, the post is removed for violating the community rules, so I didn’t remove further comments after I removed the post itself, but You’re right – I’ll remove it.

    The post was removed for a completely different reason. The post was encouraging people to lie in order to win elections – erasing the experiences of groups such as Palestinians, immigrants, the economically disadvantaged, BIPOC, and LGBTQIA+ people. There’s no way I was going to leave that up. Erasure is never okay.

    It’s very infrequent that I have to remove a post, but this one very clearly violated the community guidelines.

    I have no problem with You as a person, and I’ve always appreciated Your meaningful and thoughtful contributions to the community, even when I don’t fully agree. I’m sure You feel a bit hurt that I also applied a temporary ban for the post, but I did that because even though I personally like You and have tried to be nothing but an ally and friend, it would be completely inappropriate for me as a mod to show favoritism in such a case. I therefore applied the same temp ban I would to any other user who made such a post. It was genuinely nothing personal, and I’ll be honest – it wasn’t even easy for me to do the right thing. I almost sent You a DM to explain the situation, but I wasn’t sure it would be welcome. Now I wish I had.

    • Grail (capitalised)@aussie.zoneOP
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      1 year ago

      I do believe in erasing the experiences of minorities. If I were living in Germany in 1939, I’d erase the experiences of the Jew living in My basement while talking to the Gestapo. I erase My own experiences all the time. I misgender Myself to stay in the closet to avoid violence. Never been out as goddessgender at work or school.

      If what you are advocating is total exposure of all information having to do with minorities, you’re talking about actions that will get people killed. That’s why Republicans are trying to pass laws to require ID for Pornhub, you know. They want to know all about the lived experiences of gay and trans people by analysing our porn habits, so they can do violence against us. What you’re speaking in favour of is genocide.

      I am glad it was just a mistake, but it was a mistake that you prevented Me from fixing the easy way. I couldn’t report the comment, couldn’t reply. So I made this post, and had to put up with being grilled on My pronoun usage and told My identity is evil by various people. I didn’t defend any oppressive systems, I outlined a strategy to just shut up for a few months until it’s safe to act again without causing a genocide. I didn’t break rule 2. But you did break rules 5 and 8. Shouting down leftism. No open discussion. I did everything I could to play by the rules and disagree with you politely. Maybe instead of making an exception for Me, it’s time to actually enforce your community’s rules by not being so ban-happy with everyone. What happened today was bound to happen eventually and it’s going to keep happening as long as nobody’s allowed to have an open discussion about the election on your community. Everyone who disagrees being banned is not an open discussion.

      • LinkOpensChest.wav@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 year ago

        Lying about harboring a Jew in Nazi Germany is understandable. I personally have lied about having undocumented people in my household.

        Lying about a presiden committing genocide domestically and abroad is a totally different thing. This is more comparable to claiming that Hitler wasn’t exterminating people in death camps. This type of lie results in erasure and should never be applied, especially not to garner votes in an election.

        Lying and saying a president is trans-friendly when he literally just signed anti-trans legislation is also not okay. We need to be aware of what our government is doing.

        But on an individual level? Absolutely. I’m actually in such a position at my own job, not as a teacher, but in which I do not disclose or even obfuscate certain facts about my clients. I would never out a queer person who did not want to be outed. I personally grew up in an extremely small conservative community where I feared for my life.

        But again, that’s not what the post itself was about – it was about lying to win the election for Biden. That’s how it violated rule 2. If it were about lying to protect marginalized groups, it would have absolutely been left up.

        I outlined a strategy to just shut up for a few months until it’s safe to act again without causing a genocide

        But here’s where the erasure comes in: There is a genocide happening right now, like right this very moment, that wouldn’t be possible without our president’s support.

        I hope I’ve addressed all Your points. In any case, I re-emphasize that I cannot allow a post that suggests we lie to cover/erase genocide, border fascism, transphobia, and any other form of oppression by the state, for the same reason that I wouldn’t allow a Maoist to deny the people who died due to state-induced famine.

  • newnton@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    I’ve never heard of using capitalized pronouns, would You mind sharing a bit more about why You use them?

    No pressure at all, You obviously don’t have to explain or justify Yourself or Your identity to me or anyone, but I’ve done a bit of googling and the only references I can find are to deities and i genuinely would love to know more

    • Grail (capitalised)@aussie.zoneOP
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      1 year ago

      Four years ago, I realised I was goddessgender, and My goddess-mother suggested I try out capitalised pronouns. They felt right, so I kept using them. The inspiration for Me to try out the pronouns came from My divinegender identity, but I don’t think of the two as equal. I think the statement “Gods are referred to with They/Them” is about as true as the statement “women are referred to with she/her”. I have met women who use he/him, men who use she/her, and enbies who use everything. But if your friend is coming out as transfeminine, it’s a good idea to suggest she/her, right? I think it’s the same with Me. My pronouns and My gender identity are not the same thing, they just happen to align, as most people’s pronouns and gender do. I hope that people can respect My pronouns without having to believe everything I believe about My gender. I think the reason we use someone’s preferred pronouns can just be “They like it”, and it doesn’t have to entail any kind of acceptance of a belief system. Likewise, I would immediately respect the preferred pronouns of any two-spirit or Bissu I met, despite not being a member of either religious system.

      I wrote a couple of articles on the subject more broadly: https://medium.com/@viridiangrail/introduction-to-capitalised-pronouns-f5140e722b48, https://medium.com/@viridiangrail/on-spiritual-genders-b4152c4503cb

      On My Discord server, The Outside, capitalised pronouns are the default for everyone and everything. We use the change to our language to provoke a change in thinking. It fills the air up with magic, which is very useful because it’s an occultist server. And it has the handy benefit of getting everyone used to capitalised pronouns without starting a fight. The rate of transphobia in the server is much lower than other queer spaces I’ve been.