Some idiot told me that I don’t talk like a woman, that I talk like a man. Not that my voice sounds masculine (it doesn’t) but that I “use masculine words or phrases” what the fuck does that even mean?

If there’s a better community to post this please let me know and I’ll delete this and post it again there.

Edit: They aren’t a man, they’re a woman. She definitely gave off the JK Rowling TERF vibes though.

  • owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca
    30·
    2 years ago

    Not sure where you’re located, but maybe he was expecting the fundie baby voice instead of, you know, a person. My guess is that he’s insecure, and any woman who speaks with a modicum of confidence threatens his fragile masculinity.

  • Greercase@lemmus.orgEnglish
    29·
    1 year ago

    I’m sorry to hear that happened to you. I think I “talk like a woman” and in certain areas make a conscious effort not to. Women tend to use more qualifiers and are less definite in their statements. I will be 100% right and still say “I think” or “maybe”. It’s the whole confident women are bossy women thing. It’s not true at all, but there’s still so much of that mentality.

    They were probably just trying to say something offensive, but if it means anything it’s likely just that you’re confident and knowledgeable, because thanks to misogyny that’s what we think men sound like and not what we think women sound like. Take it as a compliment if anything. It’s possible you were just being effortlessly correct lol. And obviously that’s what women sound like if you’re a woman and that’s what you sound like.

  • LavaPlanet@lemm.ee
    133·
    2 years ago

    My Reply to him: What a fking stupid thing to say, men never fail to surprise me with their stupidity.

  • i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    111·
    1 year ago

    I’m guessing you have the audacity to speak more directly and unapologetically. For example, if you were at the table and you needed the salt, a stereotypical polite man way to say it would be “Pass the salt, please.” And a stereotypical woman way might be “sorry, can you pass the salt, please?”

    I’m not sure how deep this person’s thoughts go, but she might be expecting some more “squee,” cutesy or baby type phrases, said with a higher pitch instead of speaking with fewer qualifiers in a flatter tone.

    • dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
      7·
      1 year ago

      Men on average seem more aggressive, more willing to interrupt, more direct, less apologetic, and less expressive and do less emotional labor. They also demand more physical space, and are much more willing to take or move into women’s physical space.

      These are traits and behaviors that might make someone feel you’re more “masculine” - but these are traits women can embody as well, as ZDL points out, it’s not an essence. While some of it probably relates to our biology (which is more varied and complex than most realize), a lot of the behavior is from social programming, e.g. based on the social norms around us and the way we are raised as kids and so on.

      Still, someone might think a woman is “masculine” or “butch” for behaving “like a man”. That’s just the social context we live in, how gender is manifesting.