Die Martin Die@sh.itjust.workscake to memes@lemmy.world · 10 days agoWho?sh.itjust.worksimagemessage-square10linkfedilinkarrow-up1399arrow-down117
arrow-up1382arrow-down1imageWho?sh.itjust.worksDie Martin Die@sh.itjust.workscake to memes@lemmy.world · 10 days agomessage-square10linkfedilink
minus-squareqarbone@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up2·edit-29 days agoThe bones are good but the set up is lacking. It needs to be couple’s therapy, so the wife is in the room. And, while I like the image of him crying but still going to say it, it doesn’t fit with the new setup, so you’d have to change him to being unable to help himself. For brevity, maybe just change the last line to: my wife: …I swear to God, Jon. Don’t.
The bones are good but the set up is lacking.
It needs to be couple’s therapy, so the wife is in the room. And, while I like the image of him crying but still going to say it, it doesn’t fit with the new setup, so you’d have to change him to being unable to help himself.
For brevity, maybe just change the last line to: