Careful of going too far in that direction. I can’t accomplish tasks unless I mentally bully myself into it. “Being nice to myself” ends up with me spending 3 days smoking too much and ordering too much doordash.
I’m actually in the process of separating from my partner of 5 years now, because of this. We’re both too nice to each other and can’t push each other into accomplishing anything, and have problems self-starting without being an anxious mess about it.
Being nice to yourself is good and right, just don’t let it get out of hand. It’s just like parenting a child, you need equal parts tender love and structure.
I used to do this until my ADHD was diagnosed and managed specifically. Other medical problems might be something worth looking into, instead of just continuing to berate yourself into moving. You can be kind and still expect something of yourself.
Being nice to oneself doesnt necessarily mean that you can engulf in any kind of ‘drug abuse’ without any consequences. If you got our point right, about being nice to other humans, then you probably know that being nice to some other human doesnt mean to tell or ‘allow’ them to just smoke too much for 3 days and pretend thats a way to care for them or be kind to them. You think you need to bully yourself because thats probably what you were thaught as a child in a unhealthy relationship with parental figures. Instead of unconditional love you were told you are only enough and worth it if you are nice and hard working, always chasing the next big thing, never let yourself go etc. So by letting yourself go nowadays (smoking nonstop for 3 days) you assume you can break out of your old habits and assume its healthy, but in the end you are just trying the oposite from what you were told as a child/teenager. This still means dependency. Find your own way on what feels good. What your body likes. What your mind relaxes or enjoys etc. And do that. Dont confuse doing something good for you with something that comes easy to you like lighting a cigarette or joint.
Careful of going too far in that direction. I can’t accomplish tasks unless I mentally bully myself into it. “Being nice to myself” ends up with me spending 3 days smoking too much and ordering too much doordash.
I’m actually in the process of separating from my partner of 5 years now, because of this. We’re both too nice to each other and can’t push each other into accomplishing anything, and have problems self-starting without being an anxious mess about it.
Being nice to yourself is good and right, just don’t let it get out of hand. It’s just like parenting a child, you need equal parts tender love and structure.
I used to do this until my ADHD was diagnosed and managed specifically. Other medical problems might be something worth looking into, instead of just continuing to berate yourself into moving. You can be kind and still expect something of yourself.
Being nice to oneself doesnt necessarily mean that you can engulf in any kind of ‘drug abuse’ without any consequences. If you got our point right, about being nice to other humans, then you probably know that being nice to some other human doesnt mean to tell or ‘allow’ them to just smoke too much for 3 days and pretend thats a way to care for them or be kind to them. You think you need to bully yourself because thats probably what you were thaught as a child in a unhealthy relationship with parental figures. Instead of unconditional love you were told you are only enough and worth it if you are nice and hard working, always chasing the next big thing, never let yourself go etc. So by letting yourself go nowadays (smoking nonstop for 3 days) you assume you can break out of your old habits and assume its healthy, but in the end you are just trying the oposite from what you were told as a child/teenager. This still means dependency. Find your own way on what feels good. What your body likes. What your mind relaxes or enjoys etc. And do that. Dont confuse doing something good for you with something that comes easy to you like lighting a cigarette or joint.