We men should work on handling rejection. I learned it the hard way, but shouldn’t be like that.
Why the flying fuck is it censored? Do advertisers really have our balls in a vice that much? It says removed slut.
Because sometimes people want to…?
removedslut is going to be my new catchphrase
“Aw removedslut, I just missed the bus!”
“removedslut, Scoob, I’m glad that he’s frozen in there and we’re out here”
There’s advertising on Lemmy?
Do people use the platform? Yes.
ive seen one that is a poem creep, he was on the sidewalk giving poems solely to women only.
Swap sexes/genders.
Exact same thing plays out, with slightly different wording in panel 3.
Probably the woman accuses the man of being gay, broke, and/or busted, and/or ‘probably having a small dick anyway’, possibly also remarking on their asserted status as a virgin/incel/creep.
The woman is … roughly as likely to post a tiktok of this encounter, aimed at socially destroying the refusing man’s reputation, as the man in the original situation is to respond to being refused with additional, actual physical violence.
Both cishet sexes and genders objectify the refuser’s sex/gender in a mocking/insulting way, in their indignant retort.
That.
That’s about what I expect.
That immature and insecure people are unnecessarily cruel when their egos are damaged, and are roughly equally likely to escalate their indignant response to something more serious and damaging, its just that the manner in which they would perform that escalation differs.
How often does this situation lead to homicide when the genders are swapped?
https://ucr.fbi.gov/crime-in-the-u.s/2019/crime-in-the-u.s.-2019/topic-pages/expanded-homicide
It is very, very difficult to actually answer your specific question with existing data.
Thats why I said roughly in my original comment.
However, in general, only something like 10% to 20% of homicides in the US are committed between strangers, people who have never before interacted with each other, people who have maybe only met a few times in passing, people who would not say they really knew the other person, prior to just meeting.
The vast majority of homicides are commited between people with significant, pre-established relationships… family members, long time friends, husbands/wives, established boyfriends/girlfriends, employers/employees, etc.
Its even more difficult to try and break down ‘chance of being murdered by a stranger’ by sex/gender.
Basically, men are more likely to be murdered in something like a mugging, by a stranger, and women are more likely to be murdered by someone they already know and have a relationship with, than by a stranger.
So, to attempt to roughly answer your specific question:
Roughly the same for both, in as much as the chances of any person being murdered, at all, in anyway, by anyone, in a given year, are…
… approximately 0.000064.
… or, about 1 out of 15,624.
In comparison, you’re roughly twice as likely to die in a car accident, in a given year.
Men in general are much more likely to be murdered than women.
And men in general are also much more likely to be murdered by a stranger, than women are.
For women, its the devil you know, for men, its the devil you don’t.
But, neither of those facts really shed too much light on this specific situation and questiom of yours, as they are not specific enough.
If you can actually find a data set, a source that describes the level of granularity amd detail required to answer your specific question;
“how often are women murdered by men they’ve never previously met, vs how often are men murdered by women they’ve never previously met”
… well then I’d love to see that data.
But in general, the chances of being murdered are very, very low, in any kind of context, for any kind of person… it would require an exceptional data set or meta study to even suss out if there is a statistically significant, numerical answer to your question, beyond ‘roughly the same.’
EDIT:
You could also ask:
How often does the original situation lead to suicide?
… If you’re worried about harm reduction, in general.
Hmm. I am aware that the vast majority of femicides are committed by men the victim knows, namely male relatives and partners, but I think that most women tend to avoid being too honest/blunt with men out of the fear of violence.
I mean, yes, on a global scale, femicide, the specific homicide of a woman, because they are a woman, is a serious, persistent problem.
But… in… economically developed, generally more wealthy and stable countries?
Much less so, broadly.
https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/femicide-rates-by-country
Again, none of this data is perfect, there are a lot of gaps, but its probably reasonably accurate as a starting point.
Paraguay: ~19 / 100,000
Central African Republic & Antigua and Barbados: ~10 / 100,000
Jamaica & South Africa: ~9 / 100,000
Compare that to:
US: ~3 / 100,000
Mexico: ~6 / 100,000
Canada: ~1 / 100,000
Thats all femicides, out of 100,000 women, per year.
So… in the US… a man is more likely to just be murdered, for any reason ( ~ 9 / 100,000 men ) than a woman is, for any reason ( ~ 2.5 / 100,000 women ).
A US Man is also more likely to be just murdered for any reason than a woman is to be specifically femicided ( 9 vs 3 out of 100k ).
Something like ~90% to 80% of women who are killed, who are homicided, are killed by someone they know well, often an intimate partner, which often is a femicide…
… But a guy randomly, awkwardly failing at flirting or just communicating with a woman… is what the stats categorize as a stranger, not an intimate partner, family member, etc.
So… the idea that random men who approach women are… likely to homicide them?
Basically no, if anything its the sort of relationship opposite, statistically, women need to worry about the men they’re already in substantial relationships with, more so than a rando they’ve never met before…
… as women are homicided by strangers far, far less than men are.
IPV is a signifcant proprotion of violence done to women in the US, but its a significant proportion of … just a smaller pie chart, than the amount of violence done to men, if we’re going by violence = murder.
But… how often are men homicided by women strangers?
I genuinely have no idea.
Like I said, I can find ‘men killed by strangers’ but not ‘men killed by strangers who are women’.
I don’t know if that data exists, in a readily available format… theoretically I could try to do my own comprehensive meta analysis of existing data sets, but normally people get paid to do that level of research, lol.
Women who are homicided in the US are more likely to specifically be femicided, killed because they are a woman… but again, thats mostly from established existing partners, not randos… and they’re also just about 2.5x less likely than men to be murdered, for any reason.
I honestly don’t think anyone even bothers to study or keep data on ‘androcide’, the specific killing of a man because he is a man, a man killed by a woman he is in a substantial relationship with.
That’s what I mean by… there’s no data specific enough to attempt to actually answer your question, which I guess could also be roughly approximated as ‘what are femicide rates vs androcide rates?’
Mad over imaginary scenarios. Touch some grass my man.
TIL I am mad about imaginary scenarios, because I genderbent or genderswapped a comic.
Beyond asserting my emotional status, do you have an actual critique or disagreement with my inversion?
Or do you just have baseless insults, which do a lighter version of the same insult from my ‘imaginary scenario’ I suggested, ie, imply that i am a maidenless incel virgin who needs to touch grass?
EDIT:
Oh also, this is fun…
You are a 2 year old account, that has been dormant for ~2 years, but you woke up a few months ago to make one post, but no comments, untill 6 days ago, when you began to post a couple of comments, one of them being this one.
… yeah that’s pretty normal, eh, @militaryintelligence@lemmy.world ?
Were you perhaps on some kind of… vacation?
Inquiring minds would like to know.
Stupid fat removed slut
I take offense to the first two, I’m neither stupid nor fat.
… I can be a bit of a catty removed though.
=(Nyaa-!)=
Slut?
Well I mean, I’ve never cheated on anyone.
But I’ve also not uh… forgone a presenting and consenting opportunity to enjoy being single, lets put it that way.
/u/sp3ctr4l is permanently banned from /r/comics because your comment broke the community’s rules. You can still view and subscribe to /r/comics, but you won’t be able to post or comment.
What ban? What /r? Are you lost?
I think this is a kind of meta joke.
Initially I thought this was some kind of actual ban message, then read it again.
Its specifically formatted as if it were for reddit, not lemmy, and they’re not actually a mod here.
So… its a joke aimed at reddit moderation policies.
EDIT:
I should probably add that this did effectively jump-scare me, so, its also successful as basically a prank.
I do not like being pranked, but also… it worked.
So… blegh. lol
What rule?
I’ve seen enough other dudes have interactions with women similar to what this comic depicts that I’m not going to removed about it just because I’ve never responded that way to rejection. There’s lots of trash people in this world.
Ayyy thanks for being an understanding person, it’s appreciated
Imagine this being a revelation.
the revelation is that there are actually mature enough people to admit this is real problem instead of getting defensive, whatabouting, or gaslighting the other person
Nothing about that comment indicates it’s a revelation. It sounds more like long experience than sudden realization.
Women should just be honest… and then women and men should work together to correct anyone who fails to respect their honesty.
By force if needed.
When aren’t normal people being honest?
There’s a tricky evolutionary advantage to certain levels of deceit. You tell people what they want to hear well enough, and they’ll put you in charge. Do a slightly less apt job, and maybe they’ll just let you sleep with them. Then for some insane reason, if you do a REALLY bad job at it and walk around angry, you get bad-boy/girl points and people fall all over you to get in / stay in abusive relationships with you.
walk around angry, you get bad-boy/girl points and people fall all over you to get in / stay in abusive relationships with you.
my father had done this very well.
As he’s dressed like Gary from Pokemon, I heard this all in his egotistical voice.
Calling this comic “bait” avoids engaging with what it is actually describing. Dismissing it as provocation reframes women’s experiences as manipulation instead of responding to the pattern being shown, and that reaction itself reinforces the point.
The first panel matters. A lot of men say they want honesty, but what they often want is honesty that does not hurt. They like the idea of honesty, but do not understand how to use it to reflect, grow, or regulate themselves. When straightforward rejection is met with insults, anger, persistence, or contempt, people learn that honesty is unsafe. That is not gamesmanship. It is conditioning.
Honesty only works in environments where it is not punished. In my marriage, honesty works because my wife knows it will not be used against her. That took years of consistent behavior to build. Outside of relationships with that level of trust, honesty can carry real social and emotional risk.
Transparency is not cruelty, but it only functions as kindness when the person receiving it is capable of kindness. If you respond to honesty with hostility, you are not being harmed by truth. You are demonstrating that you cannot tolerate it.
People who claim to value honesty but lash out when they hear it are not victims of dishonesty. They are teaching others to protect themselves. If you punish honesty, you should not be surprised when people stop offering it.
Very well said. It’s very much the same vibes as the bear in the woods. If you feel offended by a bear winning out, maybe you should ask yourself why that hurts, and understand why women would make that choice.
Yup. Imagine being personally offended by the man v bear drama. I’m confident that any woman I know would choose me specifically over the bear. Why would I feel slighted by the fact that they would, on average, choose the bear over a guy that isn’t me?
and understand why women would make that choice.
I understand it fully, but am incapable of making the actual < bear guys change. If you try to reason with a chad, they just blow you off and walk away to hang out with other chads. The guys in the < bear circles are completely disconnected from my social circles.
is this even the real problem adults have in the real world?
Considering the number of times I have seen this exact scenario enacted by a man on women that I know, yes it is indeed a real problem that adults have.
americans are weird.
I rarely encounter it compared to all the other shit behaviour of apparently good people
I wish I can go a day without hating myself for being a man.
Pretty easy wish to grant yourself tbh.
If i can just not feel bad I would never feel bad.
I’ve gone my entire life without hating myself for being a man. It’s super easy
Good for you
Pray tell your secrets. Deafness? Overblown ego?
Understand that women aren’t lying when they say they’ve had awful experiences with men, and that even though I’m a nice guy, they have absolutely no reason to believe that I’m any different if they’ve never met me before. How a woman that I don’t know feels about me doesn’t matter at all to me, because the women that I do know have no problems with me.
Sorry I don’t buy that, for the same reason that I don’t buy the same kind of argument about people of color.
On the surface it seems analogous, but it really isn’t. White people don’t have uniquely bad experiences with black people that they don’t also have with other white people, and that black people don’t also have with other black people. This isn’t true of men and women. Nearly every woman has a story of that time a man wouldnt leave her alone and started threatening her. Some men have that kind of experience with a woman, and very very few people have that kind of experience with some of the same sex
Yeah I’m getting pretty exhausted with hearing MEN ARE SHIT just constantly all the time from everywhere. My bad for being born ig
Yeah. And it’s not like it’s hard to acknowledge that men face issues to and that women can also be toxic and abusive.
Yeah seems like dating now-a-days is completely borked.
The adult thing to do in that situation is to just accept their decision without drama.
Seriously, it happens to most people. Bound be to be disappointed but just accept it and move on.
I thought people got over this stuff years ago
There’s a whole subreddit for how dudes have not gotten over this stuff
And you know Reddit is 100% real life.
it’s certainly not 100% fake either.
It’s a subreddit for posting news articles about the violence women can experience with regards to this exact topic, it literally is 100% real life. Did you just not click the link?
If you ask for a direct answer, you don’t get to punish the person for giving it.
This feels like rage bait.
I’m not enraged, this doesn’t apply to me. But there are assholes who do this shit.
Not really. Just on the nose with no real attempt at humor or subtlety. Doesn’t mean it’s wrong, though.
deleted by creator
Looks more like virtue-signalling to me. Those out-raged aren’t the intended audience, they’re the punch-line.
I just would like to see the gender discussion not focused solely on the worst of men.
I don’t think they are the same people often. Are they?
