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☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmygrad.mlM to Funny@lemmygrad.mlEnglish · 3 months ago

The US government claims to have powers of chronomancy

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The US government claims to have powers of chronomancy

lemmygrad.ml

☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmygrad.mlM to Funny@lemmygrad.mlEnglish · 3 months ago
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https://www.whitehouse.gov/articles/2025/04/8716/

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  • amemorablename@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

    DOGE must have found the CIA’s stash of cocaine.

    • ☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmygrad.mlOPM
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      3 months ago

      more like psychedelics, they must be dropping massive amounts of LSD there

    • 201dberg@lemmygrad.ml
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      3 months ago

      Pff like they don’t already have their own supplies. This are silicone valley tech babies after all. The only group more coked up than these people is wall street.

  • King_Simp@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

    MAGA chronomancy vs Juche necromancy, who will win?

    • SexUnderSocialism [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      3 months ago

      I’ll put money on the one that’s centrally planned and not bogged down by privatization. juche-rose

    • commiespammer@lemmygrad.ml
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      3 months ago

      The World vs Limp Bizkit

  • sunbleachedfly@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

    That might actually be a reference to what a lot of people said in Western countries when the train was invented. The idea being that when they sped up their travel time, the physical world became smaller. This was also in reference to the telegraph in the 1800s.

    “We traveled at least eighteen miles an hour when at full speed, and made the whole distance averaging as much as twelve miles an hour. This seemed like annihilating space.” - Ulysses S. Grant, 1839

    Rivers of Darkness, “The Annihilation of Time and Space”, Rebecca Solnit

    Albeit hamfisted, but I would presume that’s what they’re referring to.

    • ☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmygrad.mlOPM
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      3 months ago

      yeah he’s likely referring to communication technology here, but the phrasing is absolutely hilarious

      • sunbleachedfly@lemmygrad.ml
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        3 months ago

        Agreed lol

      • OrnluWolfjarl@lemmygrad.ml
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        3 months ago

        To survive as an up-and-coming epic fantasy/sci-fi author, he had to get a second job writing press releases for the US government.

  • IHave69XiBucks@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

    You laugh but theyre about to reveal their plans for a mission to Alpha centauri on their newly built space cruiser with its warp drive. 45 minutes there and back.

  • USSR Enjoyer@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

  • Sinkbath@lemmy.today
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    3 months ago

    I’m sorry but did they lift that directly from 1984?

    • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      3 months ago

      Well they apparently have the technology for it so

      • Munrock ☭@lemmygrad.ml
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        3 months ago

        xi pointing at the screen

        • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          3 months ago

          lenin-laugh

      • Sinkbath@lemmy.today
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        3 months ago

        I should’ve said Ninteen Eighty-Four.

        • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          3 months ago

          I just couldn’t resist a little time travel joke lol

  • -6-6-6-@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

    Something I’ve noticed when it comes to rhetoric on Trump now is that a lot of his supporters are just reposting and repeating what is said from the White House verbatim. They don’t really have a way to defend this one so they’re doubling down. At least in 4 years I can remind libs that their precious state department was completely “flipped” into this only a short time ago and watch them crash out entirely. Not that much is different, regardless.

  • Hestia [she/her, fae/faer]@hexbear.net
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    3 months ago

    We’re going back… to 1933.

  • SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml
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    3 months ago

    Reality truly is stranger than fiction because you cannot tell me that if you read this in a book you would not cringe at how on the nose it is.

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