Drunk
You need help?
send koozie picture imediately
my king
I got a dog named Koozie and my neighbor Darell is obsessed with him. He sends me texts when he is drunk…
Do nothing. Win.
Drunk
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We did it Lemmy!
our king 👑
That photo has a really nice composition
The photographer composed the image meticulosuly to artistically foreshadow the deep emotions by using physical barriers as a frame within a frame, A marvellous inception of frames sharpening the focus into the subject portraying loneliness.
Thanks for reading the bullshit I just made up.
I love Artspeak, it’s the peak of bullshit. Remember those essay questions on tests? The people that were really good at them, grew up to write the description in art gallery brochures.
I remember stumbling into a Robert Ryman exhibit of his minimalist white paintings, with a friend who was an artist. We were amazed at the bullshit descriptions of his paintings, which were nothing but white squares (I will go to my grave convinced he was a fraud) The writer was particularly excited that they were painted on aluminum instead of canvas - MIND-BLOWING! They were still just white squares. That’s not art, no matter how many syllables you throw at it.
As my friend said: An artist primes his canvas white, and says, “Okay, I’m ready to start painting.” This guy primes his canvas, stands back to look at it, and says “Welp, I’m done!” and cracks a beer.
Is it called ArtSpeak?
I just call it the bullshit box
I kind of made that up, but it seems like that style of language should have a name. I declare it Public Domain, have at it.
Make it open-source will ya
So you think he referred to the dog as king, or the neighbor for responding with the picture?
I assume he meant the dog, the tone of his texts are not those of someone speaking to their king
Well said, my liege.
Ofc the dog.
He just wants you to show him your koozie.
Here’s mine
my king
HERESY! THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!
Pugs are a perfect representation of how humanity views the Earth.
I vocally judge every english bulldog and pug owner and only recant if they were a rescue.
My wife tries to show me TikTok videos of pugs saying, “Isn’t it cute?”
No, it’s not cute. Its entire existence is suffering and the breeder needs to be in jail for animal abuse.
What if there was an alien race with a lifespan that was eight times as long as ours, would they be able to breed the human equivalent of pugs?
We fuck and we got genes. You can play with us.
And if you objectively look at every other animal on the planet and then look at humans… how are we not pugs of our genetic family tree?
Fuckin’ humans and our weird ass pointy noses and bulbous heads. We are weird.
I always thought they were a perfect representation of how the Earth viewed humanity.
The bestest boy
I can see that.
Poor dog looks extremely overweight. How anyone could see a picture like that and think it’s cute and not alarming is beyond me.
It’s a pug. The genetic breathing problems are already alarming.
Babies have rolls like that, it sets off the same pleasure in my brain as seeing a cute pudgy baby.
Imagine what state the owner is in
Glory to his house
Okay, let’s start the conversation by clarifying the situation
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There will be fighting in the afterlife about who gets to reincarnate as Koozie.
Except that it not a dog, it is a pug.
They are perfectly named. If I’d never seen one, and someone told there was a dog called a Pug, that’s pretty much exactly what I’d picture in my mind. Just a fat little sausage.
