Whether you have plans today or are just staying in. May your Saturday be an awesome one. Stay safe, keep warm. Peace!
I made it to Sydney for my birthday today and the weather really put on a show. Short sleeves and sun hat and 500% good mood despite feeling like I nearly died a few times on the fucking roads. Getting thoroughly spoiled for the weekend. Made a few professional contacts this week too which was rewarding
E: thanks everyone for the lovely wishes!! Somehow lemmys notifications weren’t working so I saw nothing until now when I’m just about to go to bed and thought I’d check the dt. It’s actually great not being on a device all day. I’ve decided I’m going to go on more long trips and get through the backlog of Conversations with Richard Fidler
Man. Both my parents recently did ancestry kits. My mum’s dad was adopted so it was nice to work out where she really came from and she’s connected with a long lost uncle (I think I’ve mentioned that in the DT before)
But 90% of the stuff that has come out has been both fascinating and a headache. As the family academic historian, the job of wading through the shit has fallen to me. I love it but god damn once skeletons are out of that closet there’s no way to put them back.
Through ancestry we’ve found out that adopted grandfather is likely the result of family sexual violence, which is why the family wiped all record of him and long lost great-uncle never knew he existed; mum’s mum is not related to her parents at all, not anyone else in her family. She’s actually the child of a young girl that lived down the street who was 16 at the time she had nana. The father is the 46 year old father of her friend; it’s likely that the woman who, according to the new family tree, is nana’s niece, is actually also her sibling, which means old mate had a sexual relationship of some kind with his daughter.
I was just helping dad this morning. Populate his family tree and BAM. Ancestry gives us his grandparent’s marriage certificate, but also 4 OTHER marriage certificates in the name of his grandfather, with other women all over the world. And no divorce certificates. 🤦♀️ old mate had 5 wives and god knows how many children.
Is it too early for wine?
Holy fuck that’s a lot to unravel.
Bottoms up on that wine
At this point I’m just like, come at me. Oh, incest? Is that the best you’ve got? Bigamy? Unregistered adoptions? Child’s play.
You wanna know the worst of it all?
Mum was always interested in the family history, but the older generations were VERY cagey about it all. When mum’s nana died, mum went around to the house where the will had just been read out to her grandfather. He told her, “your grandmother wrote you a letter explaining the family history and left it in with the will for me to give to you. But I was too incriminating to too many people, so I burnt it.”
To this day, when me and my cousins get together we get drunk and ask each other
What 👏 was 👏 in 👏 the letter 👏???
Burnt it? How dare they! That’s going against a deceased person’s wishes! For shame. No disrespect to your grandpa intended, but I feel almost superstitious about that stuff. As executor of my late mother’s will, there were things I didn’t agree with, but in the end they were her wishes and not mine.
Nah great pop was an all around asshole, we can all say it.
but I feel almost superstitious about that stuff
You’re not the only one. Without wanting to reveal too many details, a will was Not Followed when the house came to be sold and the proceeds divided. Things that have happened in the families that were a party to it or colluded were… not good.
At this point I can only assume the sorts of shenanigans previously only known to the greek pantheon
Jesus Christ.
That’s putting it lightly
My mum did the ancestry thing and all she did was find out about second cousins and distant relatives. Found out that my like great great great uncles founded the town of Creswick.
🍷
One is not enough
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
That’s better
hands you all the wine
I know they say be prepared to Find Out Things with DNA tests, but bloody hell.Holy actual shit.
Well, at least that’s a perfect excuse for early drinks?
Dear lord. I’m the sort of family tree person in my family and thank goodness no skeletons like that unearthed on my mum’s side. Mostly just war survival stories or unfortunate alcos/gamblers. There’s one pedophile but that’s been known for over a decade.
Dad’s side, we already had the bomb dropped on us when I was 18 and found out he had a whole 'nother TWO families in different countries and three children between them, one of which was born after his first grandchild. I’m not interested in finding out any more.
But your mum’s parents, christ on a bicycle. I wonder how she’s been coping with the revelations too
Korean fried chicken and crispy lettuce sleeves 👌
Tinyest is still not happy. We’re trying a dummy. He hates it, but refuses to let go till he spits it out. I tried to remove it and got smacked. I didn’t know he had that level of hand control!
I just want to eat all the things, so I have assembled an emergency vegetable stick plate with garlic yoghurt dip. Hopefully this will distract me from less healthy alternatives.
snack
Yum
My first tip is really more a superstition than a tip. If you spill salt, you have to flick some over your left shoulder and you might as well flick some over your right too for good measure because my Nana said so and she lived until her 80s.
I wonder why this is such a prevalent superstition. Salt as a means of purification is a big thing in Japanese culture and Shintoism as well. That’s why the sumo wrestlers throw salt over their shoulders before they run at each other. A lot of restaurants have little bowls of salt at their front door too and sprinkle on the sidewalk to ward off bad luck.
I know a few grannies who throw salt outside the front door when they’ve had a visitor that they did like/didn’t want to come back
The devil reportedly sits on your right shoulder, so you are throwing salt in his eyes so he doesn’t steal your soul.
I thought the devil sat on your left?
Ah shit I meant left. Why did I say right? I mean why did I write right? Brain fart moment, thanks for the correcto!
Agree it’s pretty universal. Wicca uses salt a lot to reset to neutral status, religiously speaking.
Without looking it up I’m gonna assume it has to do with salt once being a precious commodity so using it to ward of evil spirits would be like giving it all you’ve got. 🤷♀️
What if you spilt sugar? 😜
Ants, you get ants.
Then you just clean it up and carry on.
Aye aye cap!
Your floor will be sticky!
Ok no imaginary sugars then
I should have added a 😉 - my reply got a bit lost in translation :-)
All good. I was just being silly is all
You get ants. Clean it up immediately including vacuuming.
I know I was just joking around
I figured that you might be. Still, spilling sugar is far more of a hassle than spilling salt and has more consequences.
Yep I know all this :)
Hahaha. Do you regret your question now?
Yes and no. I was hoping the emoji 😜 would show I kidding. Most often people get it 🤷♀️ oh well. No harm done 🤣
Edit: at least you understood I was kidding around and that’s what matters since I was replying to you
I’ve strained my neck and shoulder with too much crocheting. Very rock & roll.
When I first learnt to crochet my hands were in the claw position the next day.
I’m picturing Gollum but covered in granny squares :)
My poor blanket will never be finished, and I’ll need to find another destress activity. Maybe I’ll try colouring.
I have a blanket that I’ve been working on for 6 years. I haven’t gotten it out in about 6 years :(
Today started off as a bish of a day. But I wasn’t about to let that keep me down. Made a successive purchase at UniQlo . Got a couple of errands done, the others will have to wait until next week. Did a bit of walking. Just need shower, something to eat then chill for the rest of the night I think
Hmm, there is a suspicious smell in the lounge room. The dog is blaming the cat. The cat is blaming the dog. I think going for a walk until it clears might be the best option at this point.
guilty party makes quick exit
well the dog certainly leapt up to join me too, so if that is true only the cat is absolved.
I asked the google lady what Ballarats weather will be like this weekend and I swear I heard laughter from the speakers.
Didn’t have “watch a Coup d’état go down” on the cards for my weekend. But hey, I’m here for it!
Wait what. What’d I miss?
Wagner vs Russia - 2023
Russia. Leader of the Wagner group is looking for revenge against Putin and the Kremlin. And the other story is a coup happening.
Edit: no wait leader of the Wagner group is staging the coup.
I just had to google who and what the Wagner group was, but damn. How juicy
Ikr? Like it’s insane how this guy was the one pulling the strings essentially until Putin fucked him over, and then he said he wants “revenge” because I think one of the leaders got 2k of his people killed.
Prigozhin probably on the wests payroll now.
The really surprising thing to me is that none of the 'stans have done likewise. The 'stans are supplying most of Russia’s troops that aren’t criminals apparently. To the point where more than 80% of the males under 40 are now in Russia’s army. Like, most of their tax base and productive citizens. Prigozhin would do well to enlist their support. Interesting program recently on ABC RN about Trans-Nistria (part of Romania next to Ukraine) that was enlightening about the choices available to ex-soviet countries during this conflict. Prigozhin is clearly nearly as big a bastard as Putin, but appears to have the guns on his side for the moment. The abc live blog made the interesting point that Prigozhin took control of the Rostov airport ‘so that the planes would be shooting at Ukraine and not us’. Says a lot I think.
Prigozhin is def not a good guy.
The only person I know in Russia is pretty close to Rostov. We fell out cos he wouldn’t accept me for who i am but I’m trying to reach out to him.
No one saw this coming but he may have been a little more across it. Luckily he’s between Rostov and Ukraine
Screw it. Just ordered the triple cheese toasted sandwich with gochujang butter from Drom.
Lactose intollerance be damned. I have my tablets. This is happening.
I might have also ordered a chocolate pecan cookie which is basically a brownie in cookie form.
I only just checked out the website 2 nights ago. I wish they delivered
It’d be a wild ride if they attempted to enter the delivery market.
Place is constantly going off and always has a queue.
I feel like they would do well
You keep on living your best life, Smeg. You deserve it.
What Am I?
I have eyes but I can’t see
I have skin but I can’t feel anything
I can be sweet but I’m not a piece of candy
I can be baked but I’m not a cake
I am best prepared in a microwaveGood morning spud
Good morning sunshine 🌞
Are you sure they can’t feel anything?
Please don’t cause me more existential dread
You are a 3hr old coffee on sensor reheat
I want to know what baked coffee tastes like.
boil them!
Mash 'em!
stick 'em in a stew!
🤮
“Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers”
-that Voltaire guy or whatever
That was Solitaire, who also loved microwaved potato
I thought he played a mean game of cards (with himself)
False. He loves one-eye Texas stack
I’ve been intrigued by the whole “one eye Texas stack” thing so I googled “one eye Texas stack” and the first thing that came up was “Can you drive with one eye in Texas?”
I reckon your chances of having a stack would probably increase if you did, so there’s that
Pancakes, breakfast sausage, maple, butter, and a sunny side up egg. At least according to Heinlein, who may have mislead me…
Yeah im happy to be mislead by Heinlein.
I have no idea what it is. Sometimes I refer to this fun list. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diner_lingo
I think I know 😉
Bootcamp ✅
Breakfast with bootcamp ladies ✅
Dental appointment 👎
Homework 👎
Woke up ✅
Trip to the loo ✅
Cup of tea ✅
Thinking about breakfast ✅
Fed and patted little dog ✅Your morning sounds pretty damn good.
Regret my dentist trip. New guy gave the mega cleaning of doom. Teeth feel raw AF
How good are clean chompers though? My morning has progressed to 2 pieces of toast and a chat about boys. I am tired now.
Would you guys like me to give you household tips everyday? Because I have a lot of books on the subject and I have done many experiments over the years. My mum and dad were cleaners in past lives. We call cobwebs “Christmas decorations”.
Yea please. Bonus points if you also include some crack/snake oil historical ones or dumb misogynistic household tips from the 50s.
“Take a moment before your husband is due to arrive home from work to freshen yourself up” said the generation that had real cocaine in their coke.
I like the one about not nagging your husband when he gets home because he’s had a hard day and don’t forget to apply some lipstick. 💄
If I had a bump of coke, I reckon I could cook a roast dinner, clean the house and entertain the boss too. All in a pair of heels
Hell yeah 🤣
Well now I know why my brilliance has been foiled and my accomplishments tarnished
Why didn’t anyone tell me that to be useful to the church and society, I just had to iron Mr Omoikiri’s shirts?
You are a blemish in your garments!
A phrase I have never heard before, am not sure exactly what it means, but it certainly sounds bad.
I’ve got a book that recommends doing your hair and putting on lipstick before sewing
I haven’t washed my hair in four days, do you think I’ll be right to fire up the Singer?
Absolutely not! It will threadlock instantly in shock at your shameful hygiene
What if I arrange my husbands pillow for him, and offer to take his shoes off too?
No pipe and martini?
I do have books on those subjects.
Oh baby. Give it to me
For you
spoiler
Wunnderful! Does it include making pot scourers from the combings of horsehair from the horse that pulls the family carriage? And using cabbage leaves to clean the toilet (thunderbox style)? I have a copy of the 1898 edition of Mrs Beeton’s Book of Household Management, which contains useful advice on hiring a butler. And housemaids. I could use both but the supply is very limited rn.
Is it like this book that has about 1000 pages?
spoiler
Yep. Only a MUCH older edition. The recipies are about half of it. The rest is ‘household management’. Including how to clean carpets without a vacuum, and how to prepare a bedroom suite for guests of ducal rank. Used tea leaves are involved for the carpets. And guests of ducal rank expect a tin of biscuits on the mantelpiece in case they get the munchies during the night. And fresh sealing wax in the escritoire. Makes one wonder a bit what the Gs of DR were getting up to on the preceding evening.
Oh my god.
I can’t wait to hear about everything I’m doing wrong.
I haven’t read them in a really long time so I don’t know how far I’ve fallen.
Yes please. I need all the help I can get…
Anything in particular i can help with right now?
Absolutely! Like u/anotherspringchicken if it can’t be solved with bicarb soda, vinegar or gaffer tape, I’m SOL.
Yes please! My repertoire extends to bicarb soda and gaffer, and if things can’t be cleaned or fixed with either of those I’m out of ideas
I think I can improve on that.
