Back in his day a small dick was considered civilized and even divine. A large dick was considered brutish and barbaric.
TIL I’m born divine
Funny what happens when the small dicked get into positions of influence
Don’t make fun of stuff that people have no control over. Big dicks are hot. Small dicks are hot.
The only people that really care are people you’re not sleeping with. Fuck them. Not literally.
I mean, yes. But as the owner of a large dick, it does cheer me up to flap around a bit in the mirror maybe while singing the Airwolf theme. This isn’t a humble brag. Jan-Michael Vincent, as I will now pretend I have called it, is impressive.
Not that it’s good for much else obviously. Too big for most women, touches the side of the bowl or water, largely underused, sometimes people think you have an erection when you don’t and think you’re a perv, and men with smaller dicks act weird/jealous about it because they think the size of their penis is the cause of largely unrelated problems.
If it was normal sized I’d be too powerful
Bro is the original "you did a (thing) my dad will hear about it " guy.
or that he is his dad
Or that his dad is in the small dick.
I can’t touch the bottom of a tuna can, but I can blow the sides out of it!
Why the hell ya sticking your dick in a tuna can?
It’s the only place that reminds me of her.
Plot twist … Jesus is the father … of himself!
Look who’s talking, stick man
It’s to be a lesson to someone else, or something. Idk.
Man, momo Jesus is a dick.
Is that Mormon Jesus I spy?
That’s him. I’ve only ever seen a middle-eastern Jesus displayed in my church building once, but it looked much better than this one. I wish we didn’t use this depiction as much as we do.
