Andy Dick.
But he did that undercover thing in a bar, just like James Bond would!
I did not need another reason to hate Andy Dick, but I sincerely appreciate the contribution to it. Phil Hartman was gone too soon. John Lovitz was a hero for slamming Andy Dick’s head into a bar.
Yeah, was never a fan. Don’t ask me why that SA stuck in my head, but every time I see the name Andy Dick, I think about it.
Jack Black
LOL, just thinking about is too funny,
Except this is fhe one role Jack plays calm and serious, which is totally off putting.
DJ Qualls:
I’d watch that though.
sun-dried Tobey Maguire
(just a joke i like him more than Tobey)
Also kind of like a dehydrated/big-head-mode Tom Holland. And also the guy who played the British Dwight on the original UK Office.
funny that you likened him to another spider-man actor.
btw British Dwight was called Gareth in case anyone’s curious.
That’s for the spoof lol
Citizen Z would make a great bond and there’s nothing you can tell me to convince me otherwise.
Michael Cera. He does a good job, but the whole time you’re waiting for him to do his “awkward teenager” character.
They should do something like “Young Indiana Jones” but for Bond. He’s an awkward teen with none of his later suave and self assured mannerisms. Michael Cera would knock that out of the park.
Haha, came here to say that too.
Steven Segal
Genuinely bad suggestion, ought to be top comment. Everyone else is just doing lateral stuff that would actually make a great movie
I also noticed this. So many other comments are making the next Austin Powers.
Segal is right to be typecast for the role, and would try his best to play it as a real James Bond. But his best just wouldn’t be good enough.
His best is barely watchable, it’s incredible that he had a career at all
yeah but it’s almost cheating. Sagall is the worst choice, the question almost doesn’t matter
Steven Segal
He’s the most awful anything to anything though. It’s cheating.
it would be so funny to see a 007 who can’t be bothered to stand up from his chair
i can’t find the original steven seagal chapo clip that made me cry laugh the entire time. if anyone knows where it is or has an archive link please let me know
Not a clip but him relaxing between scenes of whatever Russian movie this was.
I’m not sure if this is between scenes, it could literally be part of a scene.
You might enjoy his music. It includes him adopting a Jamaican accent and singing the lyrics:
“Me want the punani see for make me nice”
He’s such a train wreck…
Adam Sandler
I mean, he’s done serious acting and been phenomenal at it.
Watch Uncut Gems if you don’t believe me that his range is incredible.
Only problem is his age would mean you’d have to set him as a retired or M-style Bond.
Honestly, a Bond that survived, became the leadership at MI6 and got drawn back into the field could be a great movie.
Edit: this made me rewatch The Man From Uncle when I realized I was describing a certain character. Put him in one of those roles and I think he’d nail it.
Or not, suave might be outside his range after all 🤷♂️
Kinda done.: You Don’t Mess with the Zohan
deleted by creator
My pick for the new James Bond
I mean…under the right director, she could pull it off. Wooden acting is perfect for an emotionally stunted character; I’d boycott the film but I could see it working.
I thought of another one:
Melissa McCarthy and Amy Schumer are…Jane Bond(s)
(Because they rebooted it, and now there are two of them, but they’re ladies with vaginas. But they totally still fart and stuff, too!)
Melissa McCarthy has already kinda done that
I thought that movie was pretty decent actually.
Thanks. I had blissfully forgotten about this.
And it’s fucking hilarious
Danny Davito
… ok but they could make a legit Bond movie (within Bond universe and everything) but cast the whole gang in it (the four of them on the “good” side ofc, maybe Waitress as the villain).
I legit had to check if there was a “wrong answers only” modifier.
I thought it was WORST, not BEST!
Whatever is the opposite of this answer is what op was looking for.
James Corden.
Oh, that might be unbeatable. You win, I think. 😅
Perfect
Ah. Beat me to it.
Jared Leto
You win 🤢
Within the realm of possibility, yet revolting.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Larry David.
Imagine him losing his shit over the smallest incovenience and start cursing all over the bond girl
“Come on. You have me tied down to a table with a laser slowly moving towards me, do you really need your henchmen wearing tuxedos? Look at him, it doesn’t match what is happening right now, why is he so dressed up? Plus he looks uncomfortable. He can barely move around cause it’s not even fitted well to him.
Come on. Let him wear something more casual. He’s already doing all your dirty work, risking his life. He can wear something more loose fitting.
Oh I’m being an asshole? You think I’m the one that’s… well then ask him. Go ahead and ask him what he would actually prefer and do it without a threatening tone and let’s see what he says.”
Rowan Atkinson
You had to pick the worst, not the best!
Yeah, Johnny English is pretty decent.
Already done: Johnny English
Black Adder will always be better than any Bond
James Corden
